


Among The Stars

by ArtisticMelody



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, Possible Feels Ride, Sadstuck, Some Minor Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-10
Updated: 2014-08-10
Packaged: 2018-02-12 14:12:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2112954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtisticMelody/pseuds/ArtisticMelody
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We looked up to the sky that summer evening, as the first star of the night started to appear... " I always wanted to be a star." He said.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Among The Stars

**Author's Note:**

> I got this idea one day for a short fanfic, and decide to write it down. 
> 
> This fanfic takes place in an AU of Homestuck, where trolls and humans have always lived together. It's from Karkat's viewpoint. 
> 
> Also, this is my very first ever, fanfic!! That I have ever made. (lol) So I apologize for any awful spelling that you may encounter. XD  
> Also for my noobness. @-@ And I apologize for any out of character moments.
> 
> Also https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oPrnrEnS45Q I highly suggest listening to this song while reading this fic. uwu

* * *

 

 

We looked up to the sky that summer evening, as the first star of the night started to appear... "I always wanted to be a star." He said. "They seem so cool and peaceful." He smiled while staring at the star.

"But, doesn't it seem lonely up there?" I said.

"Hehe, not at all!" He chuckled, I gave him a questioning look, he preceded to then say, "Look, over there," he pointed to somewhere else in the darkening sky. " Do you see it?" I looked up in the direction of which he was pointing, and saw that another star was starting to appear. " And over there too." He pointed to a new location in the sky once again. And again there was another star just faintly starting to appear. "You see, it's not so lonely up there!" His face was in an all out goofy ass grin now. I was about to say something in retaliation to him but, when I looked at his eyes, they were filled with such awe and ambition that I decided against it.

"You know," He continued. "I was thinking of joining that space expedition program, you know, that one to mars?" As he finished that sentence, I felt as though a part of me went in to shock. I was so taken aback by what he had just said that, couldn't think of anything to say, I mean, was he joking? He had to be. It had to be a joke right?! But, my gut was telling me otherwise.

He was looking at me now, waiting for my response. There was a billion things I wanted to ask and say to him rushing through my thinkpan, but all I could manage to fucking say was a simple "Yeah."

He smiled, and went back to looking at the sky again, which seemed darker and filled with even more stars now. He opened his mouth to continue talking once more. " It's a one way trip I hear, but that's okay, I really love the stars and space. So going on this expedition would be like a dream come true for me."

Still in a little bit of shock, I replied. "I see, well it  sounds like fun." Ending with an unsteady laugh.

"I could be like one of those people that you see in the movies, who goes to space and finds life up there, and learns cool new high tech, or gets like  _super_ powers, or something!"

After he had finished that last sentence, it had felt like the shock that I was previously just in, disappeared all of a sudden, and I rolled my eyes at him. "Listen," I started off. "There may possibly be new life living up there, but, I highly doubt that you're going to get there and meet said new life, which will then proceed to welcome you to it's fluffy, red, fucking, rock, of a home wonders, and then thus proceed to give you heart, fucking, warming, rock, cookies as a,thank you for stopping by, welcome to our planet gift." And I give him the most unamused face that I could make through saying all of this.

"Haha, man, you know that I was just joking with that right, Karkat?" He says while laughing.

I frown at him and say, "No, John, I had no idea whatsoever, that you were joking at all." Said in the the most sarcastic tone I could do.

He laughs even louder at that. "But you know, it really does seem like it'll be worth it! There's so much out there to explore and all!" And again, that look of awe and ambition is in his eyes, and again, I can't find the words to say. "So while I wait for the time to go, I'm going to study really hard to be prepared for it! I got six months after all! Well I have been studying for it a bit already but, there's still so much to learn!"

Wait, what the _fuck_ , does he mean that he's already been studying for it a bit _already_?! And what the fuck does he mean, while he _waits_?! And _six_ months?! Has he already been signed up for it?! "While, I wait?" I repeat back to him.

He looks at me, "Oh, yeah, I kinda already, am, err... signed up for it."

What. The. _FUCK?!_

"Sorry, that I didn't tell you sooner, I wasn't really to sure how to go about it. But, uh... Hey! Now you know." He finished saying with an unsettling laugh. His gaze then trails back up to the stars once again, and he began talking again about space, and the stars, and some other stuff that I had started to tune out.

Six months? I think to myself. That's so little... He continues to yammer on while being so, damn, carefree about all this, and a part of me feels irked by it.

 

                                                                                                ***

And just like that, six months went by so fast, the warm summer season long left behind, and freezing coldness taking it's place in the winter season. It was the morning of the launch, and although I could not be there first hand to see the launch off, I could be here, at home, watching it on a shitty old T.V. I hadn't gotten much of a chance to speak with John in the last month or so, cause he was so busy with studying, but we were able to meet a few times in the six months that went by so fast, and just have fun. But me being the great fucking idiot that I am, kept side stepping the whole space subject, yep, a real class A idiot here folks. I let out a sigh, sat down, and turned the T.V on.

There's a giant rocket setup for launch on the channel when I switch it to the news. " Ten minutes left huh?" I say out loud to myself, "Looks like this is all I can do as a fucking  goodbye, is watch." Sit and watch, not much else to do besides that, I mute the T.V, planning to turn the volume back on when it got closer to the launch time that was displayed in the corner of the T.V, I let out another sigh. Just then the phone rings, causing me to jump a bit when hearing the unexpected sound from the silence. It rings again, and I debate on whether or not to pick it up, one reason being that I did not want to miss if anything happened on T.V, another being that, I sure as hell was not, in the greatest of all talking moods right now. It rings again, and I finally decide to go and see who the hell it is calling me, to make the obnoxious ringing stop. I get up, and head towards the phone, while muttering a few choice words to myself.

I Get to the phone, pick it up, and right away say, "Listen, this better be a _god_ _damn_  important, fucking, phone call here or else-" I'm interrupted though by a suddenly very familiar, voice.

"Karkat! Oh thank god you picked up, I was worried I wouldn't be able to reach you!"

"John?" I say slightly confused.

"Yep!" He chuckles.

"Wha- but-"

"They're letting everyone have last minute phone calls, or rather... last minute goodbye's I should say. I was one of the last ones to get a call, so I only got like one or two minutes before they rush me off."

"What about calling everyone else?! Don't you have to say goodbye to them to?!"

"Hehe, I already have said my goodbye's to them yesterday. I tried contacting you to, but, I couldn't get a hold of you, so I wanted to make sure that I could today, before I left!" Dammit, Why wasn't I here yesterday when he called?! I could've had more time to talk to him, but now..... "So, yeah, I guess that this is it huh? And, hey, listen Karkat, I just wanted to say thanks, you know, for being such an awesome friend and stuff, and, uh.... For being there, for me, when I really needed it through the years, thank you." Oh god, I can't do this, I feel like I might start to break down and cry or something, this is all to damn emotional and shit for me. I start thinking to myself, and I feel as though a vast wave of mixed emotions start to come up, and I'm unsure if whether I can keep them down or not.  I'm reminded of how I felt that one summer day, when we looked at the star filled sky, all that had happened before and after that time and then... It hits me, like a ton of bricks, the reasons why I felt so sad, irked, bothered, annoyed, happy, and sometimes mad, not the usual kind to, this was like a, different kind of mad, that I feel like I couldn't figure out till just now.

"Ahhhh, crap, I have to go now Karkat. They're going to cut me off if I don't get off soon!"

Time's up idiot, it's now or never, "John..."

"Yeah?"

I take a deep breath and then proceed to say what's been holding inside all this time, "Listen, John..." I started to hear a fuzzy, static noise come from the phone.

"Aw, no, they're starting to cut me off no-"

"John! John, are you still there?!" I pleaded desperately. 

"Kar-t I'm ha-ing a hard tim- hear-g you n-w." A wall of relief fell over me that he was still there, but the call was cutting in and out now. I needed to say what, or how I felt, and I needed to say it pretty fucking fast.

"Kar- ar- y- th-e?"

I was going to say it all in one swoop, I took a heavy deep breath, and let all my feelings spill out to him. " John! Listen! Yes, I am still here, and I needed to tell you that... After all these years that I've know you, and that goddamn, goofy, ass, dorky, ass, of a face of yours. I've come to realize, that after that day, in the summer- when you said that you were leaving, I came to see just how much, I would begin to miss you and all of that dorkiness of yours, the fun times we had, the good times, where we smiled- even the sad times, I don't want you to go on this stupid space thing or- whatever, because then I would begin to miss you, and that goofy ass, grin, of yours like fucking crazy!" I sigh, "Look, what I'm trying to say, is that.... I, goddamn, fucking, love you, idiot." I wait a bit for a response, as the static starts to intensify till finally.

"Wh-t -as -ht? I co-d ba-l-y m-ke o-t on- -rd of -ha- y-u sa-d."

" I said, I love you! You- goddamn idiot! I. _LOVE_. YOU!" I yell, hoping that he'll hear me, knowing that my efforts may be fruitless though.

"Ka-t I ha-e to g- -w, so-y, I c-l-n't he- all y- s-d, - - - by- of- t- -e rs!"

The line dropped. "No...don't go.." I whispered, I could feel tears starting to build as I stood there with the phone next to my ear, just listening to the never ending, beep, sound that came from it. I had guessed that the reason he took so long to respond before, was because he was trying to figure out what was said, but it looks like it didn't get through, and I also figured that his last sentence was along the line of, "Off to the stars!" because, he's said it before going off to study and stuff. But it doesn't matter now, because I'm pretty fucking sure that he didn't hear me. As I looked over to the T.V, the count down had now gotten to two minutes, I guess I was standing here longer then I thought I was. I hung the phone up, and went over to the T.V, and turned the volume on, the news anchor was saying that the last of the expedition team had just made it on to the ship, and was strapping in for take off.

The countdown was starting now... "10." I said aloud, I wasn't sure why I was saying the countdown aloud with the T.V but... "9." I was for some odd reason. "8." Maybe this was my way of reminding myself that John was leaving, this planet forever, or something. "7." He'll be gone forever... "6." That goofy ass smile of his. "5." That ridiculous, unkept, messy hair of his. "4." Those eyes, hidden, behind thick black frames and thick glass. "3." The eyes that always lit up whenever he talked on about something he was passionate about, "2." All of him, everything... "1." Is gone now, from here.

"And lift off!" The news anchor said enthusiastically. As I watched the ship head off towards space, I felt the warmth of tears roll down my face, not being able to hold them back anymore. All I did for the next hour or so, was sit there, and stare at the T.V, with silent tears rolling down my face.

 

 

However.... This was not the last time I would cry of course, because everything turns out so fucking well in this shitty universe.

\-----

Two weeks later, it was reported, on the news, that the ship, had a faulty wire that caused a spark near the engine, the whole thing went up in one flare, the ship, exploded. Now... I really wouldn't ever see John, again.

\-----

                                                                                                  ***

For the next five months or so, I didn't talk very much to anyone. I just, kept to myself. One day though I had decided to go to that place, where, one summer day ago, it was almost around that same time of year, the place that you had told me of your dream. I sat in the spot where we had spoken, in what seemed, so very long ago now, and looked up to the evening sky. It was clear, and had a few stars in it, when I looked at them I felt a bit of anger towards them, but then I remembered how much awe was on your face, and I smiled faintly at them. I began to speak aloud, I guess it made it feel like I was talking to you.

"It's been almost a year, since I sat here with you. Things aren't the same without you, but I know that you followed your dream," Tears started to well up in my eyes. "Wearing a big, goofy ass smile, on your face to.... I really loved that smile of yours you know. But, hey look, you really did it, you followed your dreams and.... Made it among the stars." Now tears had started to roll down my face, as I tried to keep up the appearance of talking to you, with a smile on my face. But it was getting difficult, as I continued looking up to the dark evening sky, the only last thing I could think to say was. 

"You idiot."

 

And then, ever so faintly, a new star in the sky had started to appear.

         


End file.
